Accepting the Answer

The concept of ask and you shall receive is one I once followed loosely; I have witnessed its power and believe in it faithfully.  Like most people, I'd pray for something wonderful to happen, hoping it will fit neatly into the list of wants, begging for it to be all roses and bright sunshiny joy.  It is in my experience:  when we demand an answer, or focus so hard on the outcome, we lose sight of what we initially requested and it seems as though our inquiry fell on deaf ears…again.  Life is the greatest teacher; I continue to learn to ‘expect’, ‘trust’, and ‘accept’.  I expect a response will be provided clearly and at the right moment.  Trust it will be for my highest good.  I may not always like the answer, but I accept it.

Yesterday I posed an array of questions regarding inspiration on elementsofbeautystudio.wordpress.com (another blog I write).  Basically, how and what tools do you use to stir up the creative juices?   Less than two hours later, while scrolling through a spam email folder, I found a letter from a woman who had purchased my self-published book ‘Get A Compass Not A Clock’ from a local bookstore.  V.G. wrote the following:  “Your writing is captivating and transcended me into a quiet and meditative place.  I bought your book and am thinking I’d like to get a couple of more copies for friends and my 26-year-old daughter.”  

"Many blocked people are actually very powerful and creative personalities who have been made to feel guilty about their strengths & gifts." ~Julia Cameron

The first email I read this morning was from a local publication, it stated:  “Unfortunately, the piece is not for us."  For years I carried the belief that to be considered one of the good local writers I had to fit into this social group of authors.  After reading the rejection letter I heard a heartwarming voice tell me, “This was necessary.” 

In this moment, I sit at my keyboard knowing I am paving the path for others to explore their courage and express themselves authentically.  I am proud of my natural talents and of who I am.  I am grateful.  This lesson helped to remove one more writer’s block and reminded me to trust God will lead me to people who I inspire and encourage - and vice versa.  

To answer the questions, "What inspires me?"  You.

“Your writing is captivating and transcended me into a quiet and meditative place.  I bought your book and am thinking I’d like to get a couple of more copies for friends and my 26-year-old daughter.”  -V.G. 

Thank you...

Brave Enough to Walk Away from Drama

They strike at the office.  They seek out the opportunity to do it at family gatherings.  They attack your friends and loved ones without mercy.  They are ‘drama queens’, otherwise known as the ‘pot stirrers’.  Like a contagious virus on the kindergarten playground they spread unwanted, harmful, nasty and sickening things around.  And what a shame...

Drama is commonly created by those who are bored and/or unhappy with their own lives. It’s almost like they feel empowered by distributing untruths and half truths when in reality they are actually belittling themselves in front of an audience.  Sometimes the stories are made up in search of attention and approval. 

Here’s a couple of questions to ponder:  Why would someone intentionally deceive?  Are they insecure or jealous?  Do they feel insignificant?  Do they attack other people because it makes them believe they superior, grander, bigger, more important?  

This morning I wrote to a dear friend, whom I've known most of her life, the following (edited slightly):  “Here’s my advice:  Be who you are, live with no regrets, laugh as often as you can, LOVE every precious moment, and never ever allow someone to bring you down into that negative energy ~ be with those people who lift you spirits.  And simply walk away from the drama.” 

Years ago while sitting at a desk being verbally assaulted by two co-workers, I wrote the following as I cried internally: 

“I will not fight back nor

will I argue with you.

I am not weak.

This is my choice.

I am strong.

I see, respect and love

the person you are.

And forgive you for your actions.”

-Cindy Kochis

Walk away from the drama.  It sounds more difficult than it really is because the fear is of what will they do to me next looms in the dark crevasses of the mind.  It takes courage to say, “Enough!”  If you are the one they must share the gossip with, redirect the conversation to one that is more pleasant and uplifting.  Once they realize you do not want to partake in the drama, they'll stop talking to you about it.  If you are the recipient of the attacks, do your best to live your life the best you can and try, try, try to ignore them.  Be kind to yourself and listen your heart as it gently speaks your truth.  Please don’t be afraid to ask for help and support.  There are countless people who can and WILL help you. 

And when you are willing and able, maybe you can help them.

Love or Retaliate - A Simple Matter of Choice

Ending a relationship is never easy for either person.  Based on perception, memories may filter into your mind like a romantic movie or resemble a horror flick.  The choice is really up to you.  No one else can make you think your thoughts.

"Truly there is no reason why the two of you cannot remain best/close friends; loving each other unconditionally. Love is the best gift you can share with each other." -Cindy Kochis

The greatest gift the two of you can share with each other is unconditional love, respect, support and the ability to honor each other's path.  Be grateful for the time together and move forward without attempting to mar, manipulate, or destroy the person with whom you previously intertwined into your life.  The love and experiences you two shared are not meant to simply fade away. 

No matter the mental pain, no matter the history, no matter the gut-wrenching heartbreak ~ allow the tears to flow freely.  Bless 'em; bless him; bless yourself.  Explore various options in learning how to heal and transform the unloving memories/emotions so you can experience the lessons and let go of the 'stuff' that prevents only the love to remain within your heart.  

Resisting the Forward Motion

If I had a dime for every time I got distracted… ya know, a bowl of ice cream sure does sound good.

Distraction - a powerful tool we use to divert ourSelf from moving forward.  We may do two loads of laundry, wash the dishes, clean the garage, reorganize the pantry, watch television, vacuum the car, scan the internet for hours and any other task to delay us from doing certain things we claim we will do soon.  There is a part of us that knows we should tend to these tasks.  If only we could tap into the creativity energy we use to avoid deadlines, mundane routines, etcetera, and utilize it towards our goals.  Just remembered, I need to add honey to my grocery list. 

It’s not for a lack of commitment nor ambition; there are real reasons why we procrastinate.  Awareness can be the first step in moving us forward in our personal healing and assist in transforming a habit, belief, value that no longer serves our purpose.  If you are curious, take a look at how you are spending your time.  It doesn’t matter whether we intend to write the next best-selling novel, paint the dining room walls, clean the basement, complete creative projects, vacation, pay the bills ~ there is a resistance.  Why?  What is holding us back?  If I were to move the sofa over there and the bookshelf over there…                              

"We flood our minds with words!  They mesmerize and manipulate us, masking the truth even when it’s set down squarely in front of us.  To discover the underlying reality, I’ve learned to listen only to the action.” –Judith M. Knowlton

If you wish to explore the possible root causes, and this is just an idea, write in a notebook or on scrap piece of paper (even a napkin will work).  Just write.  Let the thoughts flow effortlessly through the pen without paying attention to spelling, grammar, punctuation or anything else that’ll prevent you from communicating with Self.  Sometimes just getting the thoughts out of the mind can be helpful.  If you wish, start asking yourSelf questions.  Please be loving and gentle on Self when looking within for answers. 

What is holding me back from doing ____?

What do I believe?  Is it self-nurturing?

Did someone tell me I cannot?  Who?

When did I start feeling this way?  Why?

Am I being loving to myself?

Where am I?

What do I dream of achieving?

If I could do anything, I would ___________.

Define your dreams, goals, soul’s cravings.

Describe your perfect job, business, spouse, lover, friend, home, vacation, (allow this list to evolve…)

It is okay to let the words wander and write about your day, a short story, and about your shift at work.  As with any relationship, when we take the time to communicate and express ourSelf freely, it evolves and transforms into something beautiful.

Shifting Directions

Guiding our desires like a compass, emotions inform us of what feels good and, well, what we’d rather not endure for long periods of time.  We achieve wisdom through personal experience. 

The line “there's no such thing as too much of a good thing” offers a very limited way of thinking and may lead to great boredom.  “Variety is the spice of life” invites more possibilities. 

Perspective is a key element in our expansion.  There will be days when a certain situation encourages one reaction, and on another day the same incident could result in a completely different response.  Remember, there is no right or wrong way, it is what it is, and it is all a matter of discovery.

In recent months, I’ve noticed a shift occurring in our personal beliefs.  Many short and long term relationships, employment, family dynamics, and so forth, are being altered as internal values adjust.  What previously appealed to us no longer brings enjoyment.  The familiar way of thinking, and socially encouraged behaviors we were once taught, no longer resonates with Self.   The desire is intensifying for many to see the fear-based illusions for what they are and explore new realities. 

Yearning for change can, for many, causes a great amount of internal conflict.  A vast majority of self-help books, social media sites, and advice gurus offer the recommendation to just be happy; if you can’t - fake it till it happens.  How can a person be authentic and experience growth if they are forcing themselves to stifle or ignore unwanted feelings?  The buried emotions will come to the surface, so why not deal with them when the moment arises?   It may not be easy…but so worth the effort.  When we deny our emotions, we resist the natural process of healing.  Our heart knows the direction it wishes to travel, just listen.  

A Set of Footsteps

A few years ago, on my way to the job I’d cry driving to and home from, I begged my Divine Companions for help. “Please show me love. Show me that someone actually cares… I would like to experience love.”  Oh, little did I know what the following two plus years would bring.  Careful what you ask for is a slight understatement.  I am grateful.

A question I’m often asked is, “Why would you stay in a job that causes so much heartbreak.”  The reason is simple – intuition affirmed there was an abundance of lessons to be experienced.  Awareness would be brought forth either there or the next place of employment or the next until I embraced Self.  It was my choice on how I followed through with the Shadow work – gracefully or face-plant in the dirt.  I did both. 

"The most fundamental harm we can do to ourselves is to remain ignorant by not having the courage and the respect to look at ourselves honestly and gently." -Pema Chödrön

I wrote, “I will not fight back not will I argue with you.  I am not weak.  This is my choice.  I am strong.  I see, respect and love the person you are.  And forgive you for your actions.” while three co-workers eagerly attempted to tear ME down with some of the most vicious manipulations.  Weeks, months, a period of time later, I spoke with a dear friend and described how it felt like my tower of Self crashed to the ground in a hopeless pile of rubble; I was broken; wondering how was I going to rebuild?  He smiled, and asked why, since I was provided this opportunity, would I want to use the same bricks and foundation?  Defeated and desiring to curl up in the fetal position, all I could think was, “I don’t wanna start over.”  It took a while to fully grasp his words.

Intuition strengthened.  

Choices made.  

Appreciation of Self evolved. 

“It does not matter what the opinions of the outer world are, but it does matter greatly what is within your feeling.” –Guy W. Ballard

We are experiencing life, perceived only by Self.  Truth is in the eye of the beholder is a profound statement.  The descriptions of love, hate, joy, sadness, wealth, poverty will vary based on emotional interpretations of a person in a particular moment.   Tomorrow the definitions will be altered by an action, event, situation, and so forth.   

"When your mind starts telling you what you have to do to make everything okay, don't buy into what it's telling you. The truth is, everything will be okay as soon as you are okay with everything. And that's the only time everything will be okay." -Michael A. Singer

I am grateful for the hardship of the past couple of years.  For me, it confirmed there is no right, there is no wrong, it just is.  Each of us has an important role and purpose.  It reaffirmed the power of our words – especially when the sentence begins with “I am”.  Everything we seek outside of ourselves is available to us – within our heart.  The fear of loneliness, fear of failure, fear of this, fear of that is imagined… it is only an illusion. 

There are choices.  Do you wish to follow the crowd (and their interpretation of how life is supposed to be)?  Do you independently take each footstep on your journey influenced only by Self’s desire?

Shifting Moments

There are a great number of individuals experiencing a shift in their life. A shift in how they feel. A shift in what they believe. A shift in what thoughts we consider true.

Fear is creating a false sense of isolation and uncertainty as relationships, jobs, life situations are changing. Our intuition continues to console us on this journey, while the ego (reinforced by the things we were taught) would have us believe otherwise. Emotions run high one moment, then drag ass the next.

We are in the process of transforming the beliefs at the core of our being from fear, guilt, darkness, lack into that which truly resonates with Self in its purest form ~ love. There is a peaceful solution; we feel it in our hearts. In the manner in which you are most comfortable (prayer, meditation, and so forth) ask for guidance and for this transformation to be gentle, peaceful and loving. Allow yourself to express all the emotions and resist the temptation to bury and ignore what hurts. Focus and explore various ways to experience Self-love, joy, peace, laughter, pride, and curiosity.

When the moment is right, you’ll decide, “I am content in life.” Soon, without realizing it, you’ll ease into claiming, “I love life.” Please understand this process can take as long as you want it too. The decision is yours. No one can say, “In two week, three days, 6 hours and 42 minutes you will have peace of mind.” It would be nice, but the schedule is based on ones desires in a particular moment. It is a choice.

I personally have found it’s difficult to be in a state of fear when I’m too busy giggling and enjoying the moment. A sense of humor has a tremendous impact in keeping the events of the day light and fun.

Revisiting the Bucket

Change provides a wonderful opportunity to explore a new way of being.  As heartbreaking as a change in our relationships can be; there seems to be a large shift taking place.  Whatever the situation, no matter who made the decision, understand life evolves.

When ready, and the decision to move forward is made, it’s time to focus on one’s personal journey.  One avenue is to dig out the Bucket List buried somewhere deep in a night stand, closet or maybe it’s between the sofa cushions.  If lost, then create a new list.  It’ easy to keep promising Self, “This summer I’m going to _____,” and easier not follow through.

Do we avoid these ideas because we are running from something or just running?  Is the internal battle loneliness?  Does the thought of doing something without a companion sends shivers of absolute terror into the core of your being?  If this is familiar, start small.  Do one thing alone and allow the adventure to unfold.  Remember to be gentle with Self, have fun, and follow your adventure.

It's Your Choice

We made the choices that led us to the situation we are in and no one else can take the credit or blame. If we allow another person to make the choices for us, we still made the choice to let someone do it for us. In the moment we take responsibility for our actions (and non-action) and understand that ultimately we can alter any circumstance something deep within changes. A change in Self-perception. It's not just Self-confidence, -empowerment, -appreciation, -value, -love evolving, but the entire perception of Self.

Life is about experiencing emotions – feeling and expressing. Love, hate, joy, sadness, excitement, anger, birth, death and, with a swing of the pendulum, the list continues down the path.

Ask, “What am I learning?” instead of “Why me?” By rewording the question with the intention set for a better understanding, we declare, “There is power in my words, beliefs and thoughts.”

"Live your "I Am" moment wisely." -John of Peniel

Letting go of the sense of inferiority, the false internal persuasion of insignificance and the many other deteriorating emotions towards not just our Self but towards other people, too, we change our perception of Life. It may take years, it make take only a blink of an eye – we can make the choice to allow the beautiful person we truly are to come forth instead of hiding from the Self-created fear.

Words Versus Chocolate Chip Cookie Dough

In August of 2009, this blog started off as a public means for me to track the novel I've been writing. The idea was that if I told you about my progress, I would quit loosing ambition to follow through. I'm afraid to open the computer file and see when the last time I added to the content of the story, but I'm sure it's somewhere around a year. There's a printed rough draft that lays dormant on my desktop having a love affair with the wood-grain Formica. For some reason, I get the feeling the romance is over and I need to do something with the novel. And soon.

‎"The difference between fiction and reality? Fiction has to make sense." —Tom Clancy

As my attention shifted, the words filling the text box evolved into observations; you know, things in life I was witnessing. Tossing in my two cents, I began writing from the heart on ways to empower, encourage and remind readers of the importance of Self-love. Isn't that was life is about – falling in love with Self. The blog took me on a journey that led me to self-publishing Get A Compass Not A Clock full quotes and pearls of wisdom I'd mainly wrote here.

‎"People are like stained-glass windows. They sparkle and shine when the sun is out, but when the darkness sets in their true beauty is revealed only if there is light from within." -Elisabeth Kübler-Ross

Now, things are shifting again. Not sure which direction I'm traveling but I'm up for the adventure. Thoughts of my novel poke and prod me into either finishing the work of art I've started or begin yet another and let go of the practice run. As Stephen King clearly states in his book, On Writing, “Learn to kill your babies.”

‎"Whatever we focus on expands. We focus so much on what's wrong in our lives; shouldn't we focus more on what's right?" -Marianne Williamson

There are so many beliefs, concepts... oh hell, things... that we feel we must hang onto, fix or reevaluate till we get it (what we consider) right. Writing is a passion of mine; always has been. I get such a natural 'high' from it. I can travel the world, even visit different realms and never disturb my Siberian husky sleeping on the floor right next to the casters on my office chair. When I was a kid, I'd take my mother's typewriter to the basement, use a sheet or two of her carbon paper (yes, I know what you're going to say) that I swiped from her desk and wrote my own version of a newspaper. Of course I got the best satisfaction from making my younger (you're welcome, Sis) sister purchase a copy for a nickle or whatever spare change we could find around the house.

”Words hang like wash on the line, blowing in the winds of the mind.” -Rameshwar Das

Sitting here contemplating my next paragraph, the Monkey Mind is begging me to make chocolate chip cookie dough. Not to bake cookies. Oh no... To eat the raw dough. I've conquered the house-cleaning-procrastination gremlins that go around tossing tissues on the floor and spilling houseplants onto the floor till I start cleaning. Ignoring them has gotten easier, however the cookie dough bunnies might be a different story.

‎"Choosing To Be A Victim Of Your Circumstances And Re - Living In The Shadow Of The Pain That Holds You Bonded In The Darkness , As Some Wear It Like A Badge . Yes It Happened But You " Survived " Move Past It." -Donna Genovese

Life Adjustments

Life is unpredictable, to say the least. It's an adventure. At various points it feels as though you're on top of the world; and other times, no so much.

I'm not the type of person to fluff up the subject of Life-Altering Change with artificial sweetener. When the words, “Oh my God, what am I going to do now?” crossed my lips, I didn't want to hear someone tell me, “You'll get over it,” or “Just think how better your life will be.”

Get over it? Be better? I liked things the way they were. They were comfortable. The routine was predictable. I knew what to expect.

"This is a time of adjustment...
This is not a time to re-focus...
This is not a time of planning...
This is not a time to do anything other than adjusting to your circumstance.

It is okay to rest.
It is okay to sit in silence.
It is okay to contemplate.
It is okay to remain motionless...
It is okay to be just as you are in this moment."
-Cindy Kochis

Change provides challenges, especially when you're broadsided with it. Even if I were to win the lottery, it would bring on a whole series of new stresses. Sounds silly, but when you think of it, ”What do I do?” “Where do I go from here?” “What do I expect from ME (forget about what others think)?”

This is a time of adjustment. Allow your emotions freedom and give yourself the opportunity to feel it to the core. That is when the healing gains momentum. When I'm listening to a friend talk about what they are going through, I listen. It's not for me to know why we have to go through these experiences, understand the “lesson” to be learned or even see the point of it... What I am witnessing is, in some way, life adjustments encourage us to find that same kind of love we feel for others within ourSelf – to feel unconditional love for Self.

At Your Own Pace

Change happens. In most cases, it is unexpected; an auto accident, loss of a job, an illness diagnosis, a spouse reveals a secret...the list goes on.

We all deal with change differently. Loving Self during these times can be a bit trying to say the least. Blame, regret, anger, sadness are some of the first thoughts to run rampant in our minds. In an attempt to find comfort, guidance from friends and family is sought. For some, standing there with the viewpoint of not knowing what to say or do, they offer advice and stir up more painful emotions while Self-image and confidence effortlessly slip away. They say things like, "Get over it." "Good he's gone." "Smile, life could be worse." Or more detrimental, "Buck up and put on your big girl panties." How does this help? How is this nurturing? Show me the love in those statements! You can't find it, because it doesn't exist in those clusters of words.

It's important to feel the emotions swirling uncontrollably in that moment. If you are hurting - feel it, experience it and allow it to be. Know that this is just a moment and by letting the emotions to take their natural course you will heal. Trust that you will heal. And, by golly, experience the situation as an observer. Honestly look at it without hiding, burying, avoiding what is actually happening. Don't try to see the other person's point of view. Don't waste precious time attempt to sort it all out. It is what it is, so be it.

By learning to be the observer, it has been my experience to witness and understand that this situation provided me the golden opportunity to explore ways to strengthen Self; to love Self; define Self-love more clearly.

What makes ME feel happy?
What brings joy to MY day?
What can I do for myself that I wish someone would do for me?

Take the time to feel your emotions freely and without judgment. Be compassionate to the loving person you are and allow this situation to arouse the desire for healing. Only you know what is best for you. Look within, your answers are there. Even if for two minutes, be still - quiet - and listen to your spirit say, "I love you."

Unexpected Christmas Gift

Last Wednesday as we sat facing each other, he cut me off before I could complete my statement, "I'm an easy target for them because I won't fight back. I will not participate in their meanness; there's no reason for it. It's only meant to hurt people in a feeble attempt to feel better about themselves." I sighed, "(They've) cut me down to my core with their wicket words, manipulations and need to continue their nasty dramas. They destroyed my Self-image and now I'm rebuilding..."

"Why would you want to use the same bricks and 2x4's?" he interrupted. "It'll only collapse again. If it didn't work the first time..." he paused for a moment, "You have the opportunity to begin from the ground up. You have changed - evolved - and what once served you, no longer does. Do you really want to rebuild the old you?"

"Nobody is superior, nobody is inferior, but nobody is equal either. People are simply unique, incomparable. You are you, I am I. I have to contribute my potential to life; you have to contribute your potential to life. I have to discover my own being; you have to discover your own being." -Osho

On the night of December 25th, as I lay with my head on the pillow staring into the darkness of nightfall, I heard his voice again - reminding me. "You have the opportunity to begin from the ground up." The heartbreak I endured Christmas morning caused me to notice things about mySelf I was unaware of - habits, taught patterns, learned beliefs of Self.

As the event was occurring, guilt, rage, anger, self-demolishing thoughts filled my mind. For hours after the altercation, I remained in the destructive mode; tearing every shred of my being to smithereens. I'm not worthy.

"Oh my! Did I really think that?"

With that one sentence, I slammed on the brakes to stop the descent into the spiraling out of control vortex that consumed me. An awareness deeply rooted within my soul was forced out of the shadows. I gathered internal strength to build a new foundation - reaffirming the person I truly am. Blessing the situation for the awareness it brought forth, it was released with love and light. IT was let go without strings attached. In the silence of my still mind, I send love and gratitude to all that have shown me their perceptions of me. It is not mine to alter; there is nothing to fix. It is as it is. Everyone has the freewill to develop, maintain and nurture their beliefs of themselves and others. Someday they will see the real me. Until then, I cherish who I am.

I love you. I thank you. All is forgiven. Blessings to all.

Evolving Into Peace

Words laced with poisonous venom fill the minds of many as the ballots have been tallied and the election results published. Like a vicious cycle of a dog chasing its tail, it doesn’t matter who wins or loses, few will accept the outcome and the perception of government will remain the same.

A belief is a belief that you keep thinking. Plain and simple. If you continue to believe that government is corrupt and has filled with lying bastards who are only lining their pockets with special interest money; guess what, that’s what you’ll get. It is the Law of Manifestation.

For your own personal sake, turn the angry thoughts to compassion, forgiveness and support. Yes. Let go of the fear or knowing that they will ‘screw it up’ for what you seek will be found. Start by acknowledging the elected official has a job that few are willing to pursue. Support their courage. Forgive them for (what you believe to be) previous bad judgments. We are human and will make mistakes; it’s how we learn. Compassion to give them the understanding in knowing they have their lessons to experience.

Let go of the fear (evolving from the election). Convert it to compassion and forgiveness. Support the individuals (everyone involved) in a loving manner. This is a pivotal point in how we perceive elected officials and our emotions/vibrations will impact our future.

A belief is a belief we keep believing. Fear can evolve into Peace...if you allow it.

Shifting Gears

Focus is shifting from the sense that we have to get it all done to how can I relax? Realizing that being overworked, bombarded with deadlines, a to-do list without an ending is no longer a desired way of life; we seek serenity.

Meditation can be used to release the beliefs that no longer fulfill our journey, silence the continuous chatter of the monkey mind, balance energies, access internal wisdom, grounding and align with Self. Like exercise, we know meditation will help us to feel better, be healthier and so forth. Even though the intent is there, it's still resisted. Clocks are watched; and for the Go-Getter's on a constant run, the idea of stopping their busy life for 30-minutes (forget an hour) of meditation is put off for another day. Belief that there isn't enough time delays the action because how could it possibly be productive to stop the forward motion?

On the other side of the pendulum, there are those who try so hard they exert themselves to exhaustion to create a sense of relaxation that when achieved, it's not relaxing at all. Go, go, go, stop. Go, go, go, screeching brakes. This way of life can cause metaphoric whiplash. Ease into the new routine. Do it in baby steps if need be. As a friend told me years ago, "Take your time. This isn't a race. It takes practice. What happens when you slam on the brakes too hard? You smash your forehead on the steering wheel; and who needs the headache?"

Done in niblets, meditation does not require a person to sit in an uncomfortable position with index fingertips pressed against the tips of the thumb forming circular symbols to experience inner peace. Inconspicuous ways people meditate without realizing they are doing it may include:

• Taking a long walk through the woods
• Focusing on and repeating an affirmation
• Sitting in a boat waiting for a fish to bite
• Soaking in a warm bath watching the flame of a candle flicker
• Listening to a favorite song that teleports the senses to a peaceful momory
• Stepping outside from a long day at work and taking in a deep breath of fresh air
• Watching the sun set
• Staring out the kitchen window while washing a sink full of dirty dishes
• Loosing track of time while working on a hobby

Truly there is no right or wrong way to experience serenity; what matters is the intent. It is when focus shifts to developing a healthy relationship between physical and divine Self that true love of Self blossoms naturally.

Please share the ways in which you take time for yourself.

Message in the Sky

Few thoughts invaded my mind as we rode through the countryside looking at the autumn colors. Nature is beautiful. It doesn't matter why or how the leaves turn to glowing yellows, flaming yellows or deep baritone shades of red. Truly I don't need or even desire an explanation; I revel in the miracle of evolving from one season to another.

Perched on the back of the motorcycle with camera ready to capture the moving scenery, I snapped a picture that took my breath away. A message in the sky. I didn't see the image before I took the photo. There was not a desired outcome or expectation. As soon as the image appeared in the LCD screen, I immediately snapped another picture of the same part of the skyline. The Cherub, male in appearance, looking down on us was gone, however the message was clear.

Our environment provides us with signs continuously. It is our option to pay attention. What is the message you receive when you watch the family of otters play near the riverbanks? How about the deer standing on the edge of the road? When you hear the caw of a crow gliding through the air, what's your first thought?

When something like this happens, trust your intuition to provide its meaning. Be open to the infinite possibilities. The first knowing (thought from the heart) that pops into your head is the message. The more you dwell on whether or not your are right or wrong, the less likely you will understand the intention.

Way, way back when while I was exploring my intuitive skills, a friend would have me interpret dreams. "What do they mean?" she'd ask. "What's your interpretation?" I would write it out, email it back to her and in most cases my version (let's just say) were not textbook. I got frustrated because I never had (and still don't) any interest in getting a dream interpretation book and was flat out told my answers were wrong. It didn't matter what the different symbols meant to me - I wasn't following the guidelines someone else established. Basically, it wasn't to her satisfaction. After some time later, in a completely unrelated conversation the experience was brought up and she informed me on the accuracy of the readings. She was impressed with the personalized insights she would never have gotten from her book.

We tend to discredit what we know (believe) to be true because we listen to the mind. The ego can be ready at a moments notice to dispense doubt like a candy dispenser. Instead of following our hearts, we have become accustom to turning to books and people we consider to be more knowledgeable for justification or approval or their interpretations. The priceless lesson my friend provided me was to trust my intuition and not to rely on another's. In some cases, their insight is based from their personal experience, fears, beliefs, and anything else you'd like to add to the list even though it doesn't pertain to your situation.

If the message is loving, nurturing and supportive, it came from the heart. Fear, doubt, lack, anger, rage and so forth only come from ego (mind) - not the heart. Only unconditional, pure love comes from the heart. Who's messages do you wish to hear?

Simon Says, "Relax."

A black feather with a white tip rested on the mowed grass only a step to the left of the trail entrance. The splotch of reflective blue on it is what really caught my eye. This will be a perfect addition to my collection at home, I thought. I placed it in the corner of my handbag and arranged it so it was sticking out to enjoy the journey to the bluffs over Lake Michigan.

On the path of mixed clay and small pebbles, I walked through the woods listening to the whimsical music of birds singing, the breeze ever so slightly whistling through the tall trees and the chatter of squirrels. The mind was silent while the senses embraced nature.

A warm breeze swirled around me as I stepped onto the wooden walkway planks leading to the bluffs. The radiant sun felt good as I left the shelter of the forest. A romanticized image of letting the feather float off into the great beyond vanished as I heard voices in the sitting area at the end of the trail. Smiling, I was greeted by a couple, long-time friends, out enjoying a day of playin' hooky and the scenery. The gal politely asked if I was an artist with work on display at the local art center.

I replied with a simple no. "I'm an artist of words, no a painter. I'm a writer," I said graciously regarding the mistaken identity.

Several stories and plenty of laugher were exchanged between the three of us. When I mentioned I used to write the newsletter for two of the local chamber of commerce offices she knew instantly who I was. "Your name is Cindy," said the stranger.

"Yes, I am." It felt good to be recognized ~ a faint hint of fame.

Soon the couple started the walk back to their vehicle. I soaked up the peace and quiet in solitude. Rolling white caps moved across the deep blue waters below. Fresh air filled my lungs. Life is magical.

An hour prior, I spent time with a friend who listened and allowed me the opportunity to answer my own question regarding the radio show I'd established two weeks ago. There's a reason the first Guided Journeys with Cindy did not record well and why I dealt with one hurdle after another in an effort to send the second week's edition to the producer. And, why my revised business cards (no matter what I did) would not print. It was not meant to be. I'm okay with it. I did something incredible. I moved through fear and accomplished something I thought I never could do - be a radio show host. I suppose you could say I can cross that off my bucket list.

The thing is, I knew early on that it wasn't working and I released the need/desire to continue perusing a dream. There is no regret. It was through the conversation with my friend that I truly understood that this is a time for me to enjoy life, slow down and 'smell the roses.' Not a time to be adding more obligations to my list of to-do's. Why am I finding it difficult to just stop all the busy-body stuff and witness the magic? An involuntary smirk broke the silence - "Simon say, 'relax'."

The spell of the moment faded as voices approached the sitting area. It was time for me to continue my journey back to the truck and go home to take a nap. Without hesitation or a resisted thought, I removed the feather from my purse and allowed the wind to take it from my fingertips. Curious to see how far it'd fly, I turned around to see it landed only a step to the left of the entrance of the sitting area. I giggled at irony.

I have made the decision to postpone/end Guided Journeys with Cindy. I cannot begin to thank Sahvanna at Soul's Journey Radio enough for her support, wisdom and the opportunity she provided me. She is a very talented and visionary woman with an important quest.

Our Divine Purpose in life is love of Self.

Giggling My Way Through Adversity

Ever have a couple of days where nothing seems to be going right? Roadblocks to dodge, small animals running out in front of you, white knuckle grip on the steering wheel... and the brake pedal is missing. That's how the past eight days have felt. I can proudly say that my patience has been tested and I giggled through the whole process. Well, most of it anyhow - I did cry on Thursday.

Life is meant to be fun and not taken so seriously. Personal growth is key. Are you willing to step back, look at the situation while in the moment and ask Self, "What aspect of ME am I being made aware of?"

Ah-ha. Is this a characterization, or better yet, a misunderstanding of the phrase be in the moment. Being in the moment doesn't mean to be nonchalant about the situation, it is about being aware. Does this make sense? The more I attempted to make "it" work my way, the faster the roadblocks were built. I spent all of my morning and afternoon, hence why I'm posting this today and not on Monday, trying to get the recorded show of Guided Journeys with Cindy to the producer. I spent countless hours trying to figure out how to get my voice data recorder to download the show onto the computer. Even though it was obvious Plan A was not working, I still pursued it. Then Plan B pooped up. "Yes!" I hollered and giggled with delight.

Plan B was wonderful, exciting and unexpected. Now I felt really good for having spent the $20-25 on a headset/microphone for a completely different project. A new buzz of energy rose and I spent the next hour and a half recording Guided Journeys with Cindy. A key element needs to be noted is the fact the show is 55 minutes long.

So at this point I'm all happy and giddy driving back into town for the high speed wireless internet at the library only to find out the file is too big to email. This beautiful, wonderful show is too flipping big. Ka-thud. My wild and woolly crazy buzzin' energy screeched to a halt. "What?" I exclaimed from inside my truck, "No!" I tried several ways. Nothing worked. Nervous energy started flowing out of control until I realized what I was allowing to happen and turned the focus on the fact that everything will be okay. I giggled and took the revised approach of maybe this is not how it was meant to be, but everything works out for the best.

Then Plan C hits me like a bolt of lightening. Vroom.... I drove back home like a mad woman. I recorded the beginning and ending of the show thinking the producer could cut out the meditation portion from last week's show and plunk in the middle right where it belongs. "Yes! This will work!" I spend another 30 minutes getting Plan C completed and, vroom, back into town for the high speed internet. The email was sent in a few seconds. A message was left on the producer's voice mail during the drive to work giving her a brief description of the events of the day and of the email sent to her.

Later in the evening, when it was too late to do anything regarding the show, I checked my email only to find out that there was no sound on the file. I laughed at the situation. After spending literally all day working on this project, worrying, hustling, getting frustrated only to find this out, I simply laughed. Sahvanna, the producer, reassured me all was well. In the email she wrote, "No problem Cindy, don't stress. :)" How awesome is that? My guess, she was giggling at the absurdity of the situation as I was. She made the show happen and all is well.

Everything works out. I trust that it will... I have faith.

Journey on the Woven Web

Coincidence? I think not. Several friends proclaim September is a month of rebirth, renew and time to stop thinking of what you’re gonna do and put the plans into motion. This is no long a period of rest. Awesome. I have the motivation, inspiration and the energy to pursue my dreams.

A popular social networking site has connected me with people I would have otherwise never met. Well, hold on, this string of the webbing starts even before the site was a blip in someone’s creative mind. It began the day I met Denise Iwaniw in Traverse City. Sitting in the audience listening to her adventures and information from her new book “Embracing the Mystic Within” opened a new chapter for me. Guided to go to this gathering, I knew something wonderful would blossom from it.

Wait. Back the bus up. The string on this webbing goes further back to when I worked for Marc at the local radio station WBNZ. I jumped at the opportunity to learn how commercials were produced and how the daily log incorporated into the programming. With the eagerness of a curious five year old, I was all ears. Marc taught me a lot about radio and how well-planned silence can be crucial at the right moment. However, too much dead air on a radio station causes dials to be spontaneously rotated to the left or the right.

Public speaking, with everyone’s attention focused on what I have to say, has been a bit easier to do than I anticipated. I never found comfort in standing up in front of a crowd before I facilitated several open forums last fall. I was the one who sat in the back row snickering at some inside joke that crossed my sassy mind.

Back to Denise, she shared with us that evening the internet link to her radio show on Soul’s Journey Radio. I started listening to her show on Wednesday nights when my schedule allowed. Through Denise I met show host Diana Dorell and several other wonderful women. Naturally this is how I was introduced to Sahvanna, founder of Soul’s Journey Radio, Soul’s Journey Community and the newest addition to her line up – Soul’s Journey TV. When Sahvanna inquired on the networking site if anyone had an idea for a new show on Soul’s Journey Radio I sent her an email. A dream evolving into reality…

“Be the change you wish to see in the world.” –M. Gandhi

It amazes me to witness how the web of life has introduced the people and various experiences into my journey. I am grateful for the opportunity to assist those that are ready to align and listen to the inner knowing with the Higher Self ~ the beautiful being within all of us. It is my privilege to make the following announcement:

Guided Journeys with Cindy
www.soulsjourneyradio.com
Relax and explore your sacred space as you listen to Guided Journeys with Cindy on Monday evenings at 9pm beginning September 13th. It is a safe and beautiful place for healing, insight and to hear messages from the Higher Self ~ the beautiful light being within each of us. Visit this blog often for upcoming show information. Ah...the webs we weave.

Loving the Naysayer

Forging past fear appears easy on the big screen as we encourage the hero from the safety of a cushioned theater chair. It can be another thing to stand up in the face of our own fears to move past self-imposed challenges. Fight or flight. Stand up sit down. Do it yourSelf or pray that someone else will come along to handle the situation. An old way of thinking is to have everyone else decide how to find the looming solution or seek out someone willing to stroke the ego enough to boost the internal courage hidden behind the spinal cord to come forth.

It takes practice and determination to let old beliefs fall to the wayside. As mentioned over and over, there is no right or wrong decisions - only awareness. Each choice causes a ripple effect. The problem lies in the lack of decision making while waiting for an exterior source to help. Fear can be crippling as it creates more fear until there is no movement. Yikes! In order to grow, find peace, experience joy, laugh, love, some kind of motion has to take place. Take in a deep breath and allow your shoulders to relax as you exhale. Feel better? Yeah me, too.

Inside all of us is a wise one that knows only Truth. Find time each day to pause and listen to the internal voice through meditation, reflection, daydreaming, staring off into the distant sunset and even during a long hot shower. Learn a variety of techniques to quiet the chattering monkey mind. Excuses can be found as to the why not's. What do you desired? How can you expand your experience? How can it get any better than this?

Recently I've made a significant decision. And it was easy. I trust my inner voice. Yes, it will involve spending money. Yes, it involves going more public with my services. And yes, I am feeling fear. I also know from the depths of my being this is the path in which I desire to journey. Listening to Self during quiet moments, I gracefully understand how many different experiences have lead to this moment - a manifestation. There is a stubborn, nay-saying three year-old girl sitting on my right shoulder that I've asked to be my friend. I'm listening to her fears and embracing them. I am nurturing fear with love. What better way can you think of to develop a healthy relationship? The more I love and get to understand the three year-old naysayer, the softer her tantrums and the complaints lessen. Somehow she will get my attention. I rather it come through love.