Without a plan or written list of things to do, the next three days will be what we adults label impulsive as I live in the moment. I was blessed with three consecutive days off in a row. After I did my woo-hoo dance in the office my first thought was, Yes! Thank you. And the following kinda went like this: I can go up to Marquette again. Or I could stay home and finally get my garden taken care of. Oh, camping sounds like fun. I could hang out in nature and do nothing all day. The 'I could's' became overwhelming. Another list started forming, I could make candles, draw, finish writing my novel, clean the closets, make jewelry.... I could... The sound of the needle scratching over the vinyl record filled my mind. Stop! What was I doing? I was becoming exhausted and I still had plenty of days to work before the mini-vacation.
What happened to the days when I was a child and flowed from one moment, one event, one activity to another? There was no itinerary, no plan of action, no list to scratch off the completed projects – it was just what it was. In a way I feel a bit lost as to what to do. Letting go of the I hafta's is a little trickier than I expected. There's this compulsive need to make a list, but refusing to do so is actually quite liberating. As a matter of fact, the normal routine is to have the rough draft of my Monday morning blog post completed by 8am and today the computer was turned on at 9:15.
When we were children, our thoughts were on the activities we were currently participating in not focused on what's next. Shifting from playing with my toys upstairs to romping around the neighborhood with the boys next door to riding bikes to the beach to going to another friend's house and eventually ending up back home in time for dinner. A simple suggestion turned into, “Okay, let's go.”
As I live in the moment for the next couple of days may my need to control every minute fall to the wayside and hopefully spillover into the following days when I go back to the office. Oh look, a humming bird feasting on the nectar of the flowering bush outside the window. Gotta go.
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